✨ Let me play a little imaginary game with you! ✨
Now imagine this:
You’re a teenager who’s into the typical teenager things:
* Hanging out with friends.
* Trying to fit in with the cool people.
* Listening to your favourite music.
* Being a bit rebellious too.
* BUt also trying to find out who you really are.
But there’s a catch….
You’re also a teenager who has to escape from a living nightmare, every single day. Who has to escape from reality in your home.
Going to school, is your escape.
Going to your weekend job, is your escape.
Going to different cities to wander around, is your escape.
You’re even asked to look after the house of your internship employer during their vacation. Not just taking care of the mail and watering plants. No, you’re required to stay in their home. Sleep in their home. Because they see the urgent need for a safe place. A place where you can unwind. Relax. Feel a tiny bit of security.
But every day you have to go back home, after those precious hours that you finally felt free. That you felt normal even.
So you’re standing there. In front of your home.
Wishing, hoping, praying for it to be normal.
“Please let nothing happen to me today”.
Trying to sneak up into your own bedroom. Wishing you would be safe there.
But you’re not…
You can’t even keep photos, money or other personal items in your room. Because there would always be someone who would take it. ALWAYS!
Only for you to find your photos again, months later, seeing they’re tempered with. Some crazy writing on it. Strange oily substances on it. And even things that look like herbs on it. Stones, some sort of snake skin, all that bizarre stuff…
Can you imagine living like that as a teenager? CAN YOU?!
This was my reality! My life, for years…
Living in fear of what each day would bring. What would be done to me. What would happen to me. What would become of me.
I now know that this is not a normal way of living. That this is far from healthy. And then I haven’t even mentioned more detailed stuff that was going on. ‘Cause it’s just too much…
But back then I used to tell myself it was no big deal. That it was normal. That it didn’t even affect me.
Turns out that this is a normal way for people to cope with extreme situations. Normalize it, and just keep on breathing. Your basic survival instinct kicks in, just to make sure that you survive each day.
I have been on a inner journey to heal from this. And I can tell you that it has been a long road.
A really long road…
But I now finally dare to say that I made it.
That I am a new version of me. A better version. Improved. Happy. Thankful. Loving. And yes, even accepting of it all.
It took me more than a year of extremely hard work. Complete dedication to start loving myself again. To start loving life again.
It was either doing the needed work and going through it all, or simply giving up. Giving up on myself, giving up on life.
I chose to fight.
All because I knew that there was more to life. That there was more to explore. To love. To enjoy. To live.
And yes, it required of me to dig deep. Tear open these old wounds, let it bleed, let all the pain and suffering get out. It got out of my system in the most intense ways possible.
But I survived! Damn…. I have seen what hell is like. I have lived there. Not only when everything happened to me when I was a teenager.
No, by tearing open these old wounds I got to relive it all…
I can so clearly remember me standing in the kitchen playing around with asprins. Wondering how many I would take. How many I could need to take. Just to make it all stop. To make my misery stop. To free me from all those painful memories.
Because that was the only way I could then see how it would stop. By simply making an end to my life. Leave everyone behind, even my husband and 2 amazing kids.
Thank God I didn’t do it. ‘Cause going through it all, really showed me that there is more to life then just misery. You only have to know the right way to deal with it.
Therapy helped me a lot with learning how to deal with it all. So yes, I believe in the powers of therapy. Honestly, everyone could benefit from a bit of self reflection every now and then. It will only get you so much further in life, so why the secrecy around it? But that’s a whole different subject….
But there’s so much more to it! It’s not just about healing. It’s about finding joy in life again.
Learning how to heal from it all.
Learning how to dig really deep.
How to change your beliefs about yourself.
And how to find that inner wisdom of yours.
Because it’s there, my dear.
It’s always been there.
Also in you!
It’s guiding you. Inspiring you. Telling you what’s OK and what’s not.
All you have to do is tune in and listen carefully. Dig deep and break free from your old beliefs about yourself. Because healing from within needs more than only therapy. It needs you to look at your life without judgement. It needs you to understand your true beliefs about yourself. Only then you are able to truly change it all.
And hey: If I can do it, you can do it too!
XOXO
Larissa
p.s. I’m going to tell you a little secret… One that I have been shifting towards for some time now. It’s a little secret that has been playing in my mind, but one that I know is going to be next level amazing.
So here goes…
You want to know what it takes to dig deep?
To find out about your true self beliefs?
What doing the inner work really means?
AND…
How you can use it all to create the life that you actually enjoy? A life filled with positivity, fun and love.
I’ll show you the way to all of this – and SO MUCH MORE – in my soon to be launched 7 day program!
A program that is bound to leave you inspired and motivated to turn things around, and start enjoying life to the fullest.
‘Cause that’s what you deserve baby!
Keep an eye out for more info.
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